I Was Really Pissed Off And then It Gave me The Shits

I wanted to thank you for helping me yesterday.  I must say by the end of the evening I was only feeling “somewhat” grateful.  The other part was pretty pissed off at you for being such a “heartless bastard”.   After paying all that

money and using all that time, I felt really rotten.  Not Fair! After a fairly lousy sleep, I did a collapse this morning.  I realized that that the”chip” I have been carrying all these years was the need to inflate myself for my

intelligence. So in every group setting I have been looking for status.  No wonder I feel lonely and isolated!  As you are well aware, there are a lot of smart people out there!  I have isolated myself.  I have had what I wanted all along.   I now feel more love for my “stupid self”.  I don’t need to hide it. My stupidity will be my teacher and help me grow my spiritual self and more fully connect with others.

Sharon – I copied this to you.  You were my support and Chris was my challenge. It has been a very hard but needed lesson. Oh by the way, I had a terrible case of diarreha this morning.

Could there be a connection?